14 March 2012

Das ist doof gewesen.

This means "That was dumb." I have decided that instead of being embarassed by all the dumb things I do, I will let them entertain others.

     So here in Germany there is this lovely chemically treated milk that you can leave on the shelf for ages and then drink. Does this disturb anyone else? I devised a method of drinking it after I could no longer stand life without milk. Anyways, the other day I was sent to get ten liters of this vile drink. I took the extra two liters from the cardboard carton and put it in my cart. When I went to check out, I tried to lift it out of the cart, and the box rippe a little. No big deal I thought and adjusted my grip so I could continue. As soon as the case was clear of the shopping cart all of the glue holding it together decided to desintegrate (who knows how old it was), and all ten liters of milk crashed to the floor. Thankfully, not one of them broke open and the lady behind me was nice enough to get me a box to collected my chemically-altered, crumpled milk cartons in. I checked out and appoligized to the girl I had brought along. She found it a little embarassing. She assured me that we didn't have to tell her mother. I assured here there was no way she wouldn't notice that the corners or sides of every milk carton were smashed in, and we should always tell the truth. What did I learn from this? When I am legitimately surprised I accidentally speak in English. What did the Germans learn from this? Americans really are as crazy as they think.

     I have been dealing with a terrible sore throat the past few days, and it's really not cool to not sleep, so I've been keeping myself up late enough to be tired enough to sleep through the pain. Well last night I may have over done it with the staying up late, and it didn't help me sleep. I kept waking up with a terrible pain in my throat and wishing I had refilled my water bottle before bed. Finally I remembered there was a glass of water next to my bed. I had used it to rinse the paint brush from the Mod Podge I'd been using. I realized this was a bad idea, but after the fifth time I woke up, I decided to consider it. I obviously used my good decision making process (It's not as good when the brain is already sleep deprived...):
     It's not good to drink glue water. But there's not that much glue in it, and I'm pretty sure it's non-toxic. There's plenty of water in the kitchen and even right down the hall in the bathroom. But I am so tired and I don't want to move any more than I have to. Plus the lights will wake me up and it will be even harder to sleep. It'll probably taste disgusting. I'm basically asleep. I'm pretty sure my tastebuds aren't going to even notice. I haven't slept well in a few days. I need to stay in bed.
     The yays won  and I took a swig. This was a mistake. Not only could I taste the glue (there was significantly more than I had expected), but it burned and woke me right up. I ran to get the clean water.

     Because of the tiredness caused by my sore throat and glue drinking I later slammed my fingers in my bedroom door and fell asleep while our homemade pizza was cooking. It's been a pretty interesting few days, and I am sad to say between all this and relearning to drive a standard I am not giving Americans a very good name in this little town.

     I hope you get a chuckle out of this. I do when I think about it. it's not nice to laugh at people's misfortunes, but I give you permission.You'll be laughing with me. I hope you are all well!



  1. They will all miss you when you leave (them with no funny antics to laugh at)! I think your mom is currently similarily deprived of sleep. Must run in the family.
    P.S. why aren't the girls allowed to go barefoot?
    p.p.s. you'd even drink 100% milk now wouldn't you?!

  2. Yes, I even drink whole milk now, because on the rare occasion that they buy fresh milk, it's whole milk. Oh, how I've changed!

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